Missing my son

My son left this morning on a bus to Newark, from whence he'll fly with a group of 59 others to Estonia.

I think he may well have taken a piece of my heart with him.  As a homeschooled child, I'm accustomed to him being around more than most.  Even when I'm not.

We dropped him off early because I worked today.  I'm sure many arrived soon after, but it was odd just leaving him there.  And all day, I "remembered"  him.  You see, when I'm at school substitute teaching, I usually check in with him whenever possible to see how he's doing with his work, to answer questions, clarify expectations, and just to say "hi" so he doesn't feel alone at home.  So today, when I had free moments, I thought to call him.  But of course, he wasn't at home to call.

I miss him already.

Soon, he'll board a plane and fly away.  It's a great opportunity for him, and a stretch for us all.  He's in a group with folks we know and trust.  He's off on a great adventure, and he'll have chance to understand what it means to be an American in a new and profound way.  He will serve others and it will be wonderful.  Christianity will become bigger for him seeing Christ worshiped and adored by another people in another place - yet still the same God.

We have our own plans here.  And we're looking forward to them.

But this is a new thing and a harbinger of many more to come.  You see, our kids will all eventually leave.  We know that - but we (I) forget.  I was only a year older than him when I left home for a whole year as an exchange student.  I can't even imagine doing what my parents did.  Also, I can say that even though there is a hole left behind where he normally is, it is not that hard.  It is just that different.

Very different.

And a good reminder.  Our goal is not to keep them here, but to prepare them to fly away.

Those preparations include the practical (like how to cook, clean, dress, use your debit card, where to keep your passport when you travel so it won't get stolen, and how to drive and purchase auto insurance...) and the more abstract (What exactly is insurance and why do we need it?  How to be aware of others and serve them, be a good friend.....   Who is God and why do we go to church? What is the Gospel of Christ?  Do you believe in Him?)  They are all intended for one purpose: to prepare our kids for life, living independently, and eventually life without us.

We've all taken another step.

We are intentionally trusting Christ in every respect with this adventure.

It is He who will (or will not) keep Andante safe.  And us.

It is He who guides our steps - and guards our hearts.

Thank you Lord for taking care of mine.