A visit with Honest Abe

Towards the end of the school year, Andante's teacher assigned a fun, several-week long biography project that culminated the week before school let out for the summer. Each student selected an historical figure to learn about and present to their class. They had to choose an appropriate level biography to read and then give a 10-minute presentation in character to the class, including costume and artifacts. It was one of Patience's favorite assignments a few years ago, and we understand the purpose behind the assignment well. Dante remembered it and thought it would be fun to do and got into it right away. However, our dear second-born found this assignment a bit daunting, perfectionist that he is. To summarize, he chose a book he really liked and stuck to it tenaciously despite how difficult it was to work with (no index, no table of contents, and over two hundred pages). He was behind from the get-go, and truly was in way over his head most of the way. So much for "fun" and "appropriate level." Balancing his homework and research with baseball and simply getting through the last few weeks of school was a tearful and stretching process, and this assignment sent him into a tailspin.

We stood by him, engaging with him at every step, and worked to help him learn to address his struggles, his challenges, his desires, and his stubbornness. It was difficult to know when and how to help without doing the work for him. We succeeded, as did he. It was a very hard time, but one full of great fruit in character, relationship, and learning as well. My shy child was anything but intimidated when he stood up on his "stump" and gave his speech. I helped him by typing up his notes in bullet format so he could read them and so that he didn't lose his place during his talk, and the content and the order were all dictated by him (and he had very VERY strong opinions about what he wanted to do and how!). He was creative and thorough, but did a good job deciding what to and not to share with his class. He fielded questions, in character, with poise and confidence. He maintained eye contact throughout his speech, he did not hurry or lose his spot, he knew his material, and I was incredibly (incredibly) proud. I think we were also greatly relieved when it was done. Bravo to our slow and steady boy! You did it!

Summer has begun

You have to love summer in Vermont. We do for sure. So far we've enjoyed swimming (including lessons), strawberry picking, several teeth falling out (note the obsession with pointing to the empty space in Constance's case), board and card games, and cooking with fresh fruits and veggies from the garden or the CSA.


We've tried out the new fondue pot (a broth fondue and a chocolate fondue so far), made homemade jam (Berry Cherry and Blubarb), and even made our first strawberry rhubarb pie (complete with homemade crust!).


Dante was proud of that especially and Patience and Papa Bear are begging us to make another one. We have had two birthdays, enjoyed fireworks, s'mores, the youth retreat, dinners out, and special visitors. What gifts each of these things is to us!

America

Some 25+ years ago in July, I left my country to be an exchange student in Geneva, Switzerland. This changed my life in a thousand ways - all for the better. I have befriended online the grown daughter of an acquaintance from years ago who is just completing a stint in that same place. She has reminded me of so much of what I love about Europe, and especially Geneva. That said, her words this morning describing "being American" and her love of her country resounded so vividly to me as I read them, because they are the words for the very sentiments I discovered during my time abroad, and which I still have today, so many years later. It's very similar to the way one understands "There's no place like home" when one goes away, or in the way that I discovered, after all my moving around growing up, that I was actually, in truth, "an Easterner" (and New Englander more particularly), after living in California. I couldn't get away from it, and I didn't want to - it was me. Not better, just very much who I am!

The truth is, I love the whole of the United States now in a way I could never have experienced if I had not left her for this year and a half. Eleven days ago on July 4th, I connected to the celebration of my country in a way I've never felt before. In the past, I always enjoyed the fireworks, but that's about it. I didn't have a strong sense of belonging anywhere, so naturally I couldn't connect to this celebration on a deeper level. Spending a year away has granted me the gift of "belonging." Some people leave the country of their birth and find belonging in another country. Much like the spirit of adoption, they are grafted in and a new country becomes their true home. On the other hand, the majority of us will always belong in the country of our birth, whether we're given the gift of appreciating it or not.

I've received the gift. In five weeks I'll be stepping off a plane in the United States, this time to stay. I've always thought it was super silly when people get off a plane and kiss the ground, but now I understand. The asphalt will be hot enough to fry eggs in August, so I think I'll still pass, but I finally understand the sentiment.

I still have no idea to which state I belong. I used to think it was Virginia, but now I'm not so sure. What I do know is that I belong in the United States of America and it's the most wonderful feeling.

America is not better than all the other countries. There are many other countries which deserve equal respect. To say America is the best would be like saying "my family is better than your family." I never want to have that attitude. Nonetheless, America is an amazing country, one to be proud of and worth fighting to protect. Whatever America may experience in the coming years, for better or for worse, I want to be there to experience it with her.