Tired

February has begun - in earnest. We closed out January with the braces and filling and we have had a few challenges in the process.

Constance had the filling on Tuesday, and while the actual procedure went well, we think she reacted to the nitrous oxide. After the procedure, she looked and said she felt like death warmed over (my words) and so instead of returning to school, she lounged around at home. We weren't sure at first if she was coming down with the tummy bug going around school either, which would have been very different, and so we were needing to "be prepared" either way. By late afternoon she was back to normal, so we're pretty sure it was a reaction to the medicine, and it's worth us noting for the future. I am thankful to be a stay-at-home mom who can easily flex to take care of my children and their needs, but it did require changes to my plans for the day, and I wasn't able to accomplish what I had initially planned. This in turn affected the rest of the week and added to the fatigue, as did the concern for her well-being and the watchful eye I had on her throughout the day.

The braces (Patience, on Monday) also went well, and she has had the expected level of discomfort as a side effect. We think the resulting "change in diet" may have compounded what already was turning out to be a challenging week (beginning the day before the braces) of unexplained low blood sugars. These happened all day long but most importantly at night, even in the wee hours. We have been up multiple times most nights dealing with lows, resulting midweek in significant adjustments in settings on her insulin pump. Even with that, we're barely touching the nighttime issue. She's now got a cold, which is resulting in higher numbers during the day (at least compared to earlier in the week), but the lows - or borderline numbers - at night still aren't gone, so sleep is evasive, interrupted, and frankly difficult to come by. I wake up even without an alarm to check her, and I'm struggling to stay awake most afternoons.

Finally, there have been a number of events that have triggered emotions, some closer to home than others, but deep ones in any case. Managing emotions is not easy for me, especially processing those which trigger powerfully deep ones tied to memories or experiences in my past, and thus these have added to the challenges of the week, and the fatigue. Frankly, the fatigue magnifies my emotions, and then I'm left even more drained from working through them.

It's been a tiring week - not a bad one, but a tiring one. The weather (ice ice and more ice - though there have been periods of sun) hasn't helped and we really need to manage this coming week well or we'll be primed for serious illnesses. Do pray for the sugars to level out that we might be able to sleep through one or two nights without concern and perhaps even not having to wake up several times. But mostly pray for wisdom in managing our time and expectations so that we can get the rest we need even if we continue to have to get up often at night.